Things that make me want to drink after cutting wood...

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Prof

Minister of Fire
Oct 18, 2011
711
Western PA
So I had to have some trees taken down to run power lines to the building site for my new house. One evening my uncle and cousin came out to get a few loads of wood. While I was talking to them, they shared that they plan on burning the wood this season. My uncle has an old coal furnace he uses and my cousin an outdoor boiler. When I tried to tell them why this is not a good idea, they laughed and told me, "You take this wood thing way too serious". My uncle then went on to say that as long as you don't burn pine or bird cherry, you'll be fine. He points to a yellow birch tree and calls it bird cherry. He then said, "Bird cherry will put a fire out!"

The next day, I was busy hauling what I had cut when I hear the sound of rounds hitting the bed of a pickup--not mine though. When the guy loading his pickup sees me, he drives up and asked if he could have some of the wood. He said that he just wanted a truck load for this winter, and would take anything as long as it was not pine! I was at such a loss for words, I just offered to help the guy load his truck. I did say that I appreciated him asking, even if he had already started to help himself. I'm still at a bit of a loss. I think I'll have a drink, burn some pine, then put the fire out with some bird cherry, and finally figure out why I helped a wood thief load his truck with my wood.
 
A couple of the bigger blocks off my "bird cherry" stack seem to heat my place all day. Often start the fire with a few small pine splits too. I must just be doing something wrong I guess :oops:....;)

Polite thief you have there. I think me and the dog would have walked over and invited him to empty his truck and leave, or maybe i would have phoned the cops. But on the other hand I can see how that series of events could leave you at a loss for words. Yeah, just pour yourself a drink and laugh it off. Good luck with the new place....
 
Your story really cracked me up. Put a smile on my face and that was good of you to let the thief off the hook.
You deserve a drink. Oh and by the way 50% of my firewood is pine.
 
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Scotch straight up for having read that please.

Oncw the second one is poured lets chat about hooking up family members with a face cord each of properly seasoned wood as a Xmas gift, and lets not talk about the neighbor again until morning because i have been drinking.

But the neighbor is going to have to straigten up for us to get along. If he is going to be my neighbor we WILL get along.
 
You are liable for others on your property, like it or not. It will not be a laughing matter if that thief drops a round on his foot and you're paying for his disability. He is a thief and would stoop to any low.
Make sure it is posted and place a side at the entrance that says all wood is the property of the owner.

It may make sense to leave the trees as logs so that there are no easy pickings.
 
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Is the foundation to your house in yet? if it isn't you may want to buy a bigger bottle, people amaze me everyday.
 
Its better to have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy - cuz that is what it would take to get that evening out of my head.
 
You are liable for others on your property, like it or not. It will not be a laughing matter if that thief drops a round on his foot and you're paying for his disability. He is a thief and would stoop to any low.
Make sure it is posted and place a side at the entrance that says all wood is the property of the owner.

It may make sense to leave the trees as logs so that there are no easy pickings.
The wood is along the road. I do have the land posted for a bit of legal protection. I may have to work on he wood sign, since this is not my first encounter with a thief.
 
Is the foundation to your house in yet? if it isn't you may want to buy a bigger bottle, people amaze me everyday.
Yeah--the foundation is in and the timber frame with walls are up. I've come to expect to be disappointed by the work ethic of others. I actually find myself going on and on about how good a few contractors have been--then my wife pointed out that they aren't that great, they just did their job. I did stop by the store last night and added few bottles to the shelf.
 
. He said that he just wanted a truck load for this winter, and would take anything as long as it was not pine! .
Since most thieves are only interested in their own self preservation, maybe to keep them away you should post a sign that says, ****Danger! Pine wood Danger!**** that should keep them away. ;)
 
My pile of log lengths is on my property but by the road and out of sight from the house.

Anything that is bucked is split and hauled away in the same session.

The less you tempt assholes the better
 
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I agree with the wanting to drink after that encounter. What many choose to call scrounging most others would classify as stealing.
 
Wow. I'd want to have a drink too. I also would not know what the actual what to do if I caught someone stealing my wood.
 
That's crap that the dude just started loading up wood and then asked when he saw that he was going to get caught. I go through a lot of effort to find, cut, split, and stack wood, and I sure as hell get permission before I start. I'm not afraid to speak my mind, and If I caught someone brazenly taking something from me without asking, I'd be sure and let them know first thing that I support the second amendment and that they needed to unload every single piece and stack it neatly where they took it from. As for the drink part, I'd finish my nice Jagermeister and chuck the bottle in the back of their thievin' truck when they drove off. What are they gonna do, call the sheriff? If they complained, I'd tell them to recycle it for a nickel (or a dime if they want to go to Michigan). That way they don't come out empty handed.

Why does everybody hate pine? It smells great, splits easy, makes neat sounds in the stove, and doesn't leave a lot of ash. It's a helluva lot better that poplar, cottonwood, spruce, and about 24 other woods I can think of. Just burn it dry and you won't have issues. I'd never pass up free pine. Ever.
 
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Wow . . . I'm a pretty easy going guy . . . but I think I would have some issue with a guy hauling out wood without asking first.
 
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You have it posted. You could have took his license plate number and had him arrested. Do you think that was his first time he did something like that or the last? I bet neither the first or the last.
I think I would have had him arrested. I could always drop the charges later or probably not but people like that need smartened up.
My grandfather had a nursery and grew and sold Christmas trees. People would steal trees but when he caught them they bought the most expensive tree of their life.
Needing something is not an reason to steal except in New Orleans.
 
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Yeah, my neighbors across the street cut down a black walnut not too long ago and had the logs laying next to the canal road, and some wag evidently decided to take off with them in the middle of the night, and they asked me if had seen anyone drive by. Never did find out who it was, but I can imagine they would be pissed off. That stuff is great firewood in our parts, and as someone who has made a gunstock or two in their life, that stuff can be worth a ton of money. A good gunstock blank can run in the hundreds of dollars if it has good burl grain, and this tree probably had several good ones in the trunk section alone. If this was me, I would have loved to club the thief with a good sized chunk of it. But, as Mr. Eastwood said, "There's nothing like a good piece of hickory." WHACK!
 
I could think of a couple responses:

"Well you know firewood rounds go for $XXX a cord around here, and you were taking it off my property, but I'm sure you didn't realize that, so I'll let you have what's in your pickup now for $20 (or whatever seems fair to you) and we'll call it good."

or

"Sorry, but I'm already planning to use all this wood. Let me help you unload it."

or

"If you help me move two loads up to my house, I'll let you keep a load."

I'd still be annoyed, but it would at least let him know the wood isn't free for the taking, and give him a way to retreat gracefully.


You are liable for others on your property, like it or not.

Despite what insurance salesmen and some lawyers would have you believe, there's not much direct liability on a property owner for trespassers. If they hurt themselves because of some hazardous condition you created, you may be liable, at least to a degree, so keep your property as safe as any other reasonable person would. If they hurt themselves entirely because of their own actions, such as by picking up logs and dropping them on themselves, it's their own fault. I could cite a couple cases each way, including a couple commonly talked about with mistaken details, but I don't want to get too far off topic.
 
Why does everybody hate pine?

Pine has a reputation of starting chimney fires among people who don't know much about burning wood. I've seen this theory mentioned here before. The people who think pine causes chimney fires are usually the same people who cut, split and burn wood in the same year, even if it's oak. Oak burns slow (especially oak cut down last month) and cool, while pine burns fast and hot. Now, these unseasoned oak burners create a lot of creosote build up in their chimney or liner. But because their wet oak burns so cool, it doesn't ignite it. Then they throw in some pine, and it burns real hot and ignites the creosote. Therefore (they think) pine causes chimney fires.

I don't know if that's the root of why people are afraid to burn pine, but it seems plausible. In the NW, we pretty much have no choice but to burn douglas fir since it's so abundant. Honestly, it's a great wood. Splits easy, dries very fast and produces more heat than I need in our mild winters.
 
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we pretty much have no choice but to burn douglas fir since it's so abundant. Honestly, it's a great wood. Splits easy, dries very fast and produces more heat than I need in our mild winters.
We have tons of lodgepole pine around here but I like the higher btu burning wood like doug fir and then the gold medal of softwoods the larch. I burn all three but notice a difference in burn times between all of them. No mystery about pine in eastern BC thats for sure!! Its going for $150 a cord right now. I just go get my own.
 
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