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All I want for Xmas is....my wife to be healthy and home.

Post in 'The Inglenook' started by daveswoodhauler, Dec 22, 2011.

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  1. daveswoodhauler

    daveswoodhauler Minister of Fire

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    Haven't posted much lately as my wife has been fighting some pain and considerable swelling in her arm, and hasn't been able to use her right arm at all.
    So, after this has been ongoing for 6 weeks with numerous Dr visits, CT scans, etc. primary care Dr could not find anything wrong....was 100% of no blod clot, etc... had no clue on where to lead my wife, so we had to figure it out ourselves via the internet. (Mother in law is a nurse, so that helped)
    Fast forward 4 more days, we pleaded with my wife to see a vascular surgeon in Boston who specializes in a rare syndrome that most Dr's don't know about....and primary care physician was 100% confident that she did not have....agreed to see us after surgery with no appointment....he took one look at my wifes arm and immediately admitted her. (Primary care physician said 100% no clot) Well, performed a venoscan, and not only was there a huge blod clot, but the blood was pooling all the way to her hand as it could not escape her arm. (For reference my wife is fit, active, and her right arm was 9 cm's larger then her left in circumfrence)
    She is on meds to break down the blood clot, and then will have surgery to remove her upper rib to allow proper blood flow to her arm, then have angio work to repair the scarred vein.
    Lessons learned...you have to advocate for yourself.....Dr's have about 7 minutes to spend with you, so if you have an issue you sometimes need to research (a lot) on your own) Don't pick a primary care physician if possible cause its "convenient". Research ones and then find those within a network of other Dr's that you can get referred to recently.
    So, what do I want for Xmas....for my wife to be home, and for my 3 boys ages 9, 7 and 4 to be abel to see their mom on xmas.
    Thanks....just had lots of penned up stress lately, and needed to vent...mods pleae feel free to move or dump if needed. Just feels like a family here sometimes.

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  2. Gasifier

    Gasifier Minister of Fire

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    Dave,

    This is a family. And I just said a prayer for your loved one. You are correct, you have to watch out for yourself. Thankfully you did. And you caught this. I know it sounds strange, I am not one who goes to church every Sunday, but hold your wife's hand and say a prayer. Even if in your own mind and to the one up stairs. I can not explain it, sorry. I hope you and the ones that you love have a Merry Christmans and a Happy New Year! Peace!
  3. Dix

    Dix Minister of Fire

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    Dave, gas is right, this is a family. We're all pulling for you all.

    Major Dixie & Matisse snuffles coming at ya.
  4. fishingpol

    fishingpol Minister of Fire

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    Sheesh Dave, wow. I'm glad they were able to figure out what it was and help her out. I hope all goes well. Stay strong and keep your chin up. It sounds like she is in good hands and a plan to help her out.
  5. TMonter

    TMonter Minister of Fire

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    Hoping your wife has a swift uneventful recovery and is home in time for Christmas!
  6. begreen

    begreen Mooderator Staff Member

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    You are so right. Hope your wife has a speedy recovery, but stay on top of this all the way. Our medical system can be very indifferent at times. You are her best advocate.
  7. snowleopard

    snowleopard Minister of Fire

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    Sounds like your wife has a wonderful support system. How stressful for everyone involved! And how fortunate you all are that you didn't take no for an answer.

    Rare--shmare. When it happens to you or yours, the odds are 100%. Poor baby! That must have hurt like the dickens!

    ETA: and good on that doctor who didn't stand on ceremony or office hours or pomposity. Saw her and responded immediately. There are good ones out there and not so good ones.

    I had one that walked into an exam room, pulled a bottle of pills out of her pocket and tossed to me from across the room. She'd (mis)diagnosed me from my chart. Almost got on a plane for the (genuinely) middle of nowhere in the middle of winter and just didn't feel comfortable with her call. The night before I was to fly out, I swung by the clinic one more time, got a different caregiver and was told to head straight for the hospital. "Can't I . . . " No "But . . . " "What part of straight to the hospital . . . " "But it's New Year's Eve and I start a new deductible in two hours and I haven't spent this year's yet." No. Three weeks and two surgeries later I finally got on that plane. Wouldn't have made if I'd been out there, as the weather shut the island down a few days after my first scheduled flight was to have arrived.

    You have to trust your instinct with these things. And let the good docs know how damned grateful you are. They deserve it.
  8. GAMMA RAY

    GAMMA RAY Minister of Fire

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    That is some story. I work in healthcare and can't tell you how many stories similiar to your wife's I have heard. I went through some crap myself about a year and a half ago. If it wasn't for me doing my homework and begging for diagnostic testing, they would have never found my thyroid problem. My family dr blew me off and wanted to put me on an antidepressant. I have known my family dr forever, I even dated him dammit. Doctors today are becoming too lax. There are many good ones out there but finding one is hard. I am glad you found a good one for your wife. Sounds like things are on the right track now.

    I hope everything goes well Dave. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.
  9. firefighterjake

    firefighterjake Minister of Fire

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    My wife works in healthcare and she says it's a scary place sometimes . . . if folks only knew half of the story they would realize that there are many changes that should be made to get the focus where it belongs -- on the patient and the patient's well-being.

    On a more personal note . . . here's to hoping your wife has a quick recovery and is back home soon.
  10. Jags

    Jags Moderate Moderator Staff Member

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    Good catch, Dave. And well wishes to you and yours and hopefully everybody can be together for the holidays.
  11. Adios Pantalones

    Adios Pantalones Minister of Fire

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    Damn man. It does take some strength to be your own advocate in the face of such experts.

    Good to see you here, and good to have a confident diagnosis. Surgery is no fun, but it's the forest you have to go through so best of luck.
  12. webbie

    webbie Seasoned Moderator Staff Member

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    Wow.....we were in Boston ourselves yesterday (regular medical stuff for daughter) and are also questioning why her feet are red.......all the time!

    It really showed me how laser focused these docs are...we asked some top neurosurgeons about it since we thought it was related to her condition (tumors pressing on nerves) - they said they never saw it before. But they also seemed, when pressed, to know absolutely nothing....and I mean nothing....about it or what to do!

    One of them said "well, I remember something maybe from back in medical school".....

    This is not meant to be a critique of doctors - specialty is the name of the game. But it sure would be fine in the future to have more "generalists" to steer folks in the right direction. After all, I highly doubt it is normal for your feet to be red all the time....
  13. fossil

    fossil Accidental Moderator Staff Member

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    Dave, I'm hoping for the very best possible outcome for you & your family. Rick
  14. daveswoodhauler

    daveswoodhauler Minister of Fire

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    Thanks Folks. Heading back in about an hour to see her and get the results of the second vein scan. Hopefully the TPA is working and starts working on breaking up the clot.
    I was amazed by her surgeon....he saw us at 6:00 pm (Tues night) with no appointment, and the first thing he did was apologize for making us wait so long....he then spent two hours with us, and when we went to bring my wife to her room it was already ready. (Surgeon put her on the fast track) Had we not found this surgeon, my wifes next appt was not for a few weeks, and by the she would have most likely lost use of her arm/hand, and could have been a stroke victim as the next clotting would have started in her chest and neck area.....not good. My MIL also mentioned that in her 40 years of being a nurse, she has never seen a Dr. walk a patient down to admissions and get her started in the process and make sure all is ready for her.....he was godlike...and I am not kidding when I say that.

    Craig, completely understand when you mean......there needs to be more generalists with a wide range of info, so when they can't help, they can at least point you in the right direction....not asking for miracles, just asking for the Dr's to not give up on the patient. (I probably passed you on Storrow Drive, lol)
    I had a real interesting conversation with my wifes primary care dr last night when she called the house at 8 pm...I explained to her that the specialists saw a number of issues with the CT scan that was performed at our local hospital, even though the local hospital said it was perfectly normal. (My mother in law who has been a pediatric nurse for 40 years basically ripped her a new one and the Dr was pratically crying when my MIL finished her words with her)

    Its a struggle trying to keep everything same at home, especially for my 4 year old that just wants his mummy....after I put him to bed last night I was in tears last night as I think everything just caught up to me...thank god for close and loving family always willing to help.

    Well, off for the ride to Boston, and thanks for all the suppport here...you folks are great.
  15. snowleopard

    snowleopard Minister of Fire

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    The love of a 4-y.o. son for his mother is one of the substances that oils the axis of the earth. Another is the love of a mother for her child, no matter the age (as the doctor on the phone may have just discovered. It's one thing to patronize a new mommy, but entirely another to mess with one who *knows* how badly the doc screwed that one up, and has nothing to lose by saying so. Ursala the Sea Witch has nothing on a mother whose child was put at risk needlessly. Thank the forces that be that sons, mother, and you will get her back safe and sound.

    In my field of work, if I say, "I don't know," I follow it up with either, "but I will find out", or "this is where you can go to find an answer". You're right, Craig, being a generalist (in any field) is a kind of specialization, but not all generalists have figured that out.

    Dave, best to all involved for a from-this-point-onward uneventful recovery.
  16. Backwoods Savage

    Backwoods Savage Minister of Fire

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    Dave, we pray all will turn out well in the end. Good for you for staying on top of this and thank God for that surgeon.

    This reminds me of a fellow who rode his bicycle in the Race Across the West last summer. After the race, several days later, he started getting swelling in a leg. Story went almost exactly like yours and he is also married to a doctor! Thanks to their persistence, he turned out okay but that could have been much worse. He was told that he was very lucky that the clot did not get to the heart. You can imagine what would happen then. Wow.
  17. daveswoodhauler

    daveswoodhauler Minister of Fire

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    Just got home for the hospital. Appears that the TPA is working in breaking up the clot, and the swelling is down. Was looking up, but now she has a fever and some hives...so hopefully it might just be a reaction of either the many meds or her body dealing with breaking up all the clotting that is now circulating in her body. Progress from yesterday, but I still wont feel good until she is home. I gotta get some sleep as its gonna be a long day tomorrow.
    Looks like when she gets home, she will be on cumatin and have to have daily bloood checks until the surgery....all I can say is what a ride this has been.
    You folks are the best...I mean it.
  18. Dix

    Dix Minister of Fire

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    Awesome news !!!

    Snuffles yet again :)
  19. Shari

    Shari Minister of Fire

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    Dave,

    Very scary stuff but with persistence you found the proper medical care. Some doctors and nurses are angles in disguise and it sounds like you found the right one for your wife. Best wishes for a full recovery!
  20. HollowHill

    HollowHill Minister of Fire

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    Dave, So sorry to hear about your wife's illness, but very glad she is now under good care. She's where she needs to be right now. Do they know what caused her clot? I have a genetic disease which causes me to be prone to blood clots, and although many in my family have had blood clots galore over the years, I was the first diagnosed with it, so it's not always checked. There are about 3 different genetic causes for increased clotting which have only been discovered in the last decade. So, it would be good to try to get to the bottom of what caused the clot in the first place, to hopefully prevent any reoccurrence. But, I imagine her doctors are doing so. Best wishes to you and yours, hang in there.
  21. firefighterjake

    firefighterjake Minister of Fire

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  22. Badfish740

    Badfish740 Minister of Fire

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    Dave posted this in response to what was going on with my little girl a few weeks ago:

    Back at ya buddy :) Prayers sent!
  23. kenny chaos

    kenny chaos Minister of Fire

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    Dave- Sending waves of energy your way.
    Kenny
  24. daveswoodhauler

    daveswoodhauler Minister of Fire

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    Well, I got my present today early for Xmas, as my wife and I just got home, and the boys were so happy to see mummy.....just to see them all run out the door to greet us in the driveway in their jammies brought the tears to my eyes......crazy how emotional you get when you are getting 1-2 hours a sleep / night.
    My wife is usually the patient one and I am the yeller in the family, so with her into the hospital I had to morph into her mode and just take care of the kids and get things done...while trying to balance and see her every day at the hospital....I think I did pretty damn good as she went in Tuesday, and I only yelled at the kids once this morning, lol. It kinda went like this this morning....."Daddy is on the verge boys, so I really need all of you to step up to the plate and be big boys today...can you do that for me????" ......well, darnit all, they all stepped up....and I have to say my 4 year old was the best.......

    Got a long road ahead for us in Jan with a surgery and major proceedure, but overall I am just happy that we are going to be together for xmas. All you have posted have been great, and just gave me the strengnth and hope.

    Ps. On a selfish note...I am so glad that I can now fire up the Lopi that hasn't seen fire in days... so I fired it up tonight even though I am going to fall asleep in 2 minutes....tomorow I cannot wait to put on my grubby clothes and just get outside to haul some wood in, lol.

    Every once in a while, you have one of those "oh chit" weeks......and I just think one is needed once in a while for me to realize what is important in life and put things in perspective.
  25. Dix

    Dix Minister of Fire

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    Awesome !!! Funny how things come together to make a Christmas :)

    Good for youse guys :)
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