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How to choose a religion

Post in 'The Inglenook' started by precaud, Jan 13, 2012.

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  1. precaud Minister of Fire

    joined: Jan 20, 2006
    2,272 posts
    Sunny New Mexico
    A friend sent this to me, I found it hilarious!

    Attached Files:

    precaud, Jan 13, 2012
    #1

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  2. begreen Super Moderator

    joined: Nov 18, 2005
    36,436 posts
    South Puget Sound, WA
    LOL Yep, that about covers it all except for Zoroastrians and Pastafararians.
    begreen, Jan 13, 2012
    #2

  3. snowleopard New Member

    joined: Dec 9, 2009
    1,494 posts
    Where do Baha'i fit on this chart?
    snowleopard, Jan 13, 2012
    #3

  4. Jack Straw Minister of Fire

    joined: Dec 22, 2008
    2,040 posts
    Schoharie County, N Y
    Wow...I am a Jehovah's Witness, Thanks. Now I have to drive around and bother people at home. I can't vote or celebrate holidays. I want a do over! :-S
    Jack Straw, Jan 13, 2012
    #4

  5. kenny chaos Minister of Fire

    joined: Apr 10, 2008
    1,995 posts
    Rochester,ny
    I'm Mormon. I'm guessing fundamentalist. :lol:
    kenny chaos, Jan 13, 2012
    #5

  6. GAMMA RAY Minister of Fire

    joined: Jan 16, 2011
    1,980 posts
    PA.
    Start disliking bacon and wear underwear then...... :lol:
    GAMMA RAY, Jan 13, 2012
    #6

  7. firebroad Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 18, 2011
    1,060 posts
    Carroll County, MD
    LOVE IT!

    Got to share this
    firebroad, Jan 13, 2012
    #7

  8. Jack Straw Minister of Fire

    joined: Dec 22, 2008
    2,040 posts
    Schoharie County, N Y

    Hey, I love eating bacon while going commando!

    Would you like a copy of the Watchtower?
    Jack Straw, Jan 13, 2012
    #8

  9. firebroad Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 18, 2011
    1,060 posts
    Carroll County, MD
    ...And I am a Wiccan.
    firebroad, Jan 13, 2012
    #9

  10. GAMMA RAY Minister of Fire

    joined: Jan 16, 2011
    1,980 posts
    PA.
    I have plenty of copies thank you very much....they have stalked me for 7 years now....I guess they think I look like bad news.... :coolsmirk:
    GAMMA RAY, Jan 13, 2012
    #10

  11. firebroad Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 18, 2011
    1,060 posts
    Carroll County, MD
    If you tell them you are Catholic, they will be polite and leave. If you tell them you are Wiccan, they will leave and never darken your door. Also, they will pray for you, never can hurt!
    firebroad, Jan 13, 2012
    #11

  12. Pallet Pete Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 27, 2011
    3,207 posts
    Ovid MI
    Ha This is too funny and inaccurate! Maybe I just started a posting war oooops :lol: All kidding aside I just said get of my property or I will remove you they said what about paradise I said do you want to get there faster and they left hahaha!!!!! That was after roughly 8 times pestering me while working in my garage in one week!

    Pete
    Pallet Pete, Jan 13, 2012
    #12

  13. firebroad Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 18, 2011
    1,060 posts
    Carroll County, MD
    Careful, or we are liable to be shut down for ragging on our JW friends.
    firebroad, Jan 13, 2012
    #13

  14. webbie Administrator

    joined: Nov 17, 2005
    11,041 posts
    Western Mass.
    Let me guess.
    They get a heathen vibe from you?
    webbie, Jan 13, 2012
    #14

  15. webbie Administrator

    joined: Nov 17, 2005
    11,041 posts
    Western Mass.
    But according to John Templeton, who spent hundreds of millions on research, it may not hurt but it doesn't help!

    Throwing dice and doing a Wiccan dance helps just as much - scientifically proven....so does watching Family Guy.
    webbie, Jan 13, 2012
    #15

  16. firebroad Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 18, 2011
    1,060 posts
    Carroll County, MD
    I have never objected to anyone who felt like they needed to pray for me--for just that reason ;-)
    firebroad, Jan 13, 2012
    #16

  17. Hogwildz Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 3, 2006
    5,636 posts
    Next to nuke plant Berwick, PA.
    I either tell them to go F themselves, or that I worship Satan, and would they like to come in for some Koolaid. Haven't had any back here in a while.
    Hogwildz, Jan 14, 2012
    #17

  18. kenny chaos Minister of Fire

    joined: Apr 10, 2008
    1,995 posts
    Rochester,ny
    Are we talking about how to pick a religion or how to impress kids? :coolsmile:
    kenny chaos, Jan 14, 2012
    #18

  19. Jack Straw Minister of Fire

    joined: Dec 22, 2008
    2,040 posts
    Schoharie County, N Y

    I thought he was talking about politicians who came to his house campaigning
    Jack Straw, Jan 14, 2012
    #19

  20. DAKSY Super Moderator

    joined: Dec 2, 2008
    4,034 posts
    Averill Park, NY, on Burden Lake II...
    I had a Jehovah's Witless Car full of em (2 men in suits, 2 nicely dressed women) pull
    into my driveway one hot summer when I lived in a more rural part of the county &
    when they opened the doors, I let loose a whistle & my 95 lb Lab/Shepherd mix (Riley)
    came screamin across the yard...All FOUR of em jumped in the car & rolled up the windows
    & locked the doors!
    I let em sit there & sweat for a couple of minutes before I chained Riley up & asked how
    I could help them. One of the guys pulled his Witless Digest or Mother Witless News or
    whatever propaganda it was & it had a 40mm Bofors Anti-Aircraft gun on the cover. He started his spiel
    & I told him that I might have MADE that gun at Watervliet Arsenal (look it up). He started to
    spout fire & brimstone about the evils of war & I said if I didn't make em somebody else would,
    & why should I give up MY job? He started on me again & I just walked away & unchained Riley.
    Once again they scrambled back into the car. EWhen they realized that the dog was not gonna
    be chained, they bailed. Word must've got out, cuz they NEVER came back...
    DAKSY, Jan 14, 2012
    #20

  21. PA Fire Bug Burning Hunk

    joined: Jan 13, 2010
    248 posts
    Blair County, PA
    This worked out well for me but I'd like to think that I'm not boring or generic. The Jehovah's Witnesses have me on their list. The same lady visits several times a year. I don't agree with some of their core beliefs but I agree with many of their moral values.
    PA Fire Bug, Jan 14, 2012
    #21

  22. Hogwildz Minister of Fire

    joined: Nov 3, 2006
    5,636 posts
    Next to nuke plant Berwick, PA.
    Was thinking more Jonestown
    Hogwildz, Jan 14, 2012
    #22

  23. Seasoned Oak Minister of Fire

    joined: Oct 17, 2008
    2,071 posts
    Eastern Central PA
    The interesting thing about religion is each one has to believe that theirs is right and all or most of the other ones are wrong. They all cant be right, but it is entirely possible that they all can be wrong.
    Seasoned Oak, Jan 14, 2012
    #23

  24. Singed Eyebrows New Member

    joined: Jan 22, 2009
    1,420 posts
    Midwest
    Don't get me started Randy lol, Randy
    Singed Eyebrows, Jan 14, 2012
    #24

  25. potter Feeling the Heat

    joined: Aug 8, 2008
    307 posts
    western NY
    Me either, have kept my mouth shut so far. I will point out the path to atheism is the shortest and most direct on the chart. :coolgrin:
    potter, Jan 14, 2012
    #25
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