Name my new red stove contest.

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"Lil Red Riding Wood"
 
I find this post amusing . A little light heartness after some heated debates, is just what the PHD ordered.

To me what rings in my mind, keep it simple studid.

with that in mind, I would call my stove exactly that "my stove"

Reason being ,calling it different , will always return to" my stove" as the explanation,

or people will not understand what the hell you are refering to
 
CLIFFORD!!

(the big red dog!)
 
I see a red stove and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the Summits burn dressed in their amber clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I see a line of stoves and they're all painted black
With kindling and splits both never to come back
Like a newbie burner it just happens every day

I look inside my stove and see it's heart is black
I see that red stove and it's been painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts
It's not easy firing up when your whole stove ain't black

No more will my red Summit turn a deeper hue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you
If I load tight enough into the setting sun
My stove will burn for me till mornin comes

I see a red stove and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the Summits burn dressed in their amber clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

Hmm,hmm,hmm,...

I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black

Yeah!

(With apologies to Mick, Keef and the boys)
 
WAY tooooooooo much time on yer hands! But very well done
 
Curse you Bart! That's gonna be rattling in my head all day now!
 
BeGreen said:
Curse you Bart! That's gonna be rattling in my head all day now!

That's what happened to me. I was out whacking and bucking a pine tree and it sneaked into my head and kept rattling around. Came in to cool off and dumped it here hoping it would stop.
 
I finally got it out of my head, for about 10 minutes. Then this popped into my head and replaced it. Hope it haunts you all night :)

Ode to Alderlea

I should have known you'd be hotter than hell
There's a lesson to be learned from this and I learned it very well
Now I know you're not the only big stove in the store
If I never hear your name again, it's a steel stove at the core

And I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red Summit stove

You never cared for a combustor inside
For you I'm just an ornament, somethin' for your pride
Always burnin', never carin', that's the life you live
Smokey minutes of your time were all you had to give

And I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red Summit stove

Oh, oh, oh
I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The mornin' sun is shinin' like a red Summit stove

with profuse apologies to the Cyrkle, Paul Simon and Bruce Woodley
 
Mrs-GVA said:
Mr_Super-Hunky said:
I will offer up a valuable prize to the winner (such as an scented, autographed 8x10 glossy of your truly), or possibly a can of turtle wax (your choice).

So let me know what you might suggest for a good name. I will consider it.

Um guys....I really don't want to offend anyone here....but all you guys are just trying too hard to win this contest. Its only a scented autographed 8x10 photo......

GVA likes....ROUGE-SPIKE. I don't get it :-/ Oh he just informed me the GE is silent.....whatever! Now GVA is trying to win the picture!

By the way, his laptop is busted so he keeps leaning over my shoulder.....lets hope it gets fixed soon!

Ah, a woman with quality taste. Seems there is only the name recognition for most.

On the other hand, when you bust your knuckles loading a split, or raise a blister by touching the door, and not the handle... when you have to clean the glass for the third time this week and the ash pan spills and soils the carpet..... You're still going to think the same thing, "YOU OLD Whore." Not because it is, but because we will not let you forget.

There are lots of other red stoves, VC, Jotul, etc. Why is it the PE is know as the WHRed? Does it have a soft velvet cover?
 
BB, BG, you guys are killing me. Good thing I can pour coffee out of the laptop!

How about "Atomic Fireball".
 
Dedicated to BeGreen's F400

Heat Me Jotul

Well since I put you in I've been out stackin in the shed
I tell folks I'm so happy
Happy that you ain't red

Blue/black Jotul you look so fine
And heat the house in so little time
Ya gotta heat me Jotul
Heat till April one more time

Heat me Jotul.
Heat, heat me Jotul...

We thought about VC
But had some questions about the ash pan
Then we saw a PE Summit
And that really upset our plan

Well, Jotul you caught my eye
And hearth.com gave the reasons why
That you could heat me Jotul
Heat till April one more time

Heat me Jotul
Heat, heat me Jotul...

- The Beech Boys
 
Uncle! This is too much. I'll never stoke another fire without that tune popping into my head.

We either stop here or gone on to recording "Songs from the Hearth". I'm sure we could assemble a batch of musicians from the Hearth crew. It's a sure sell to KTel for late night sales.

How about:

Morso, people who need Morso,
Are the pluckiest people in the world...
We're learning needing other burning
And yet letting our grown-up pride
Hide all the need inside
Burning more like children than woodsmen
 
So who won this contest??
 
stick burner said:
"Mr. Chilpotle"

That's a red, smoked, and hot jalapeno pepper for you boys up north that may not know. Come down here to the "bad lands" and I'll fix you up a dish with some. Great stove name, don't you think?

Stickburner

Stickburner:
Like your thinking, but that's way to nice for a PE, should be "Ms Chipolte". I grew up on Northern New Mexico food, Did a Christmas thirty years ago with dried red and green chiles on the Tree. Made chili verde a Christmas tradition. Remember the smoker working on the Turkey with my attention from 6 am til dinner. Mesquite and pinion. I didn't know what pesto was, but I liked the favor of the nuts.
 
Red Rover
 
Craig - You should be putting a little guitar, and a blues spin behind some of this. Maybe a little video. INSTANT HIT I tell ya, INSTANT.
 
It's the big red Summit headed for Arizona

The big red Summit headed for Arizona
(Burn baby, burn baby, burn baby burn)
Ain't burnin yet but the PHD says it's gonna
(Burn baby, burn baby, burn baby burn)
And stacked in the racks by the big garage
Is a pile of pine bigger than the local Elk's lodge

And everybody says that there's nothin funny
About those stoves you can buy with Candian Tire Money
They burn real clean and they burn real hot
And they aren't really polished with wild Moose snot.

It's the big red Summit headed for Arizona

Took Hunky months but he finally chose her
(Burn baby, burn baby, burn baby burn)
If the latch ain't crooked he'll be able to close'er
(Burn baby, burn baby, burn baby burn)
Well, he's gonna light a fire now sooner or later
If he ever figures out just how to uncrate'er

- Jan and Dean Hearth Unlimited
 
Diet coke through the nose just isn't as funny as it sounds. BB your killing me. (man that make my nose burn and eyes water). Wild moose snot. <snicker, snort>
 
Okay, UPDATE:

Today I received my new stove. It is a beautiful deep shade of red, but a deeper-darker red like a very deep spagetti sauce red. It is beautiful and will compliment the home perfectly.

I can post some pics, but probably better to wait until it is installed as it is all crated up right now.

I would love to keep this contest open for a while longer as my bother from another mother "Bart" obviously has found a much needed outlet for his prose!. Bart, some of it is quite good and the rest of it made me pee my panties!. lol!.

While I must admit for the most part, I probably will just call my new stove........""the stove"!, this contest is fun and some of the names have really stuck in my head. I think "Scarlet-o-heater" ofered up by Titan is a tough one to beat, but who knows, double B , (Brother Bart), seems to be making up some ground with his poetry.

Remember, it is not often that such fantastic prizes (choice of) are offered up like this, so keep the suggestions comming.
 
If you haven't moved it into the house already do yourself a favor. While you are waiting for the install stick a piece of stove pipe in the top of it and do the curing burn outside. Stink up Arizona, not your house. Also, it will turn an even darker red/maroon when it is running hot and then go back to original when it cools down.

BTW: The stove is Whorehouse Red and will be forever more. I want my tin of wax.

Congrats on the blessed arrival.
 
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