You Know You Are A Real Pellet Burner If...

If you know what brand of pellets a particular stand of trees would be, if it was turned into pellets.

Or, what brand of pellets a container of dirty demolition and/or used pallets would be! It happens!

If you cock and lock your Glock when a white van drives by.

If you can read the braille from the little air holes on the bag.

When you routinely go for lil rides in a old van with a few other pigs and a smelly old bear.

Blue .....

bring it on baby, security is enabled, dogs are hungry and the 50 cal is in the turret locked and loaded.............

Better have some really good ammo in the pop gun ironpony, Pete has upgraded the armor on the "van".

Have an A-10 Warthog (tank Killer) on standby, out of Rickenbacker, about 4 minutes away

You Know You Are A Real Pellet Burner If...


You slow down for wrapped pallets,.. only to discover Mortons Watersoftener Salt.

That sounds dirty.....

...if you can throw a 40# bag like its nobody's business.

I personally await the inclusion of "the pellet bag toss" in the Olympic Games....if they do it by weight class, like boxing or wraslting I'm a shoe in for a gold in the 160-169 lb division. I also do an excellent interview with Bob Costas....leave him speachless and looking confused.

And if they are actually pellets, You force the driver to pull over and attempt a bribe so you can get them dropped in your yard! I wonder if this is how OMV got his?

You know you are a real pellet burner if ...

you know how to spell HARMAN

Isn't that spell Harmin?

You were just sittin' there waiting for me weren't ya?

Well now that I'm not getting 25 PM's a day from OMV, I kinda have some extra time on my hands!

When you have the wife trained so well that when you are away deer hunting she knows her 40 cal. isn't only for her own personal protection , but also for the protection of the pellet stash! 'Love that woman!

....when you walk into a horse barn, notice that they are using pellets for bedding and leave with a shopping bag full..."just to see how they burn"
(Found out later they were NEWP's)

You like to dust your pellets so you can huff them without sneezing.

You Know You Are A Real Pellet Burner If...

You see stacks of pellets outside in the elements, and start ranting.

You freakuently' open the hopper just to comb your fingers through them..

If you spill a small amount of pellets from a bag in the garage your on your hands and knees picking up every last one and toss them into the stove

.... You spend your Birthday money buying pellets "Just in case"

You can disassemble, clean, and reassemble your stove blindfolded and with one hand tied behind your back!