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You Know You Are A Real Wood Burner When...

Post in 'The Hearth Room - Wood Stoves and Fireplaces' started by BrotherBart, Nov 6, 2008.

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  1. EDGE

    EDGE New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2008
    Messages:
    34
    Loc:
    Northeastern ND
    It's when, on a really cold night, a guy says he's going out to "see a man about a horse", when he really just wants to go out and get a good hit of frosty woodsmoke.

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  2. adrpga498

    adrpga498 Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2005
    Messages:
    868
    Loc:
    New Jersey
    When during the shoulder season you check the 15 day forcast every 4 hours hoping it'l change colder.
  3. BrotherBart

    BrotherBart Hearth.com LLC Mid-Atlantic Division Staff Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2005
    Messages:
    29,065
    Loc:
    Northern Virginia
    When you constantly end up sleeping under just a sheet because Accuweather blew it and missed the low temp forecast by ten degrees. Again.
  4. myzamboni

    myzamboni Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    May 22, 2007
    Messages:
    1,071
    Loc:
    Silicon Valley
    When you are in a clothing store, that has some log pieces stacked in an ornate fashion for a display, and you point out to the wife that there's 3-4 days firewood just sitting there.

    You then proceed to ask the store manager when the display is coming down and if anyone has laid claim to the wood.
  5. JustWood

    JustWood Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2007
    Messages:
    3,525
    Loc:
    Arrow Bridge,NY
    ...... you make a career out of processing and delivering wood.
  6. fossil

    fossil Accidental Moderator Staff Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2007
    Messages:
    10,322
    Loc:
    Bend, OR
    I don't see the word "burn" in there anywhere, Lee. :p Rick
  7. JustWood

    JustWood Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2007
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    3,525
    Loc:
    Arrow Bridge,NY
    I think I just got burned! :eek:hh:
  8. LLigetfa

    LLigetfa Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2008
    Messages:
    7,358
    Loc:
    NW Ontario
    You know you're a real wood burner when you are totally oblivious that "lighting up" could also have a very different meaning.

    Yeah man!

    Then again, maybe you remember "lighting up" while working on that wood pile and wondering why it has a ramshackle look to it.
  9. Deep Fryer

    Deep Fryer Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2008
    Messages:
    118
    Loc:
    East Coast NY
    Great thread, I'm probably a bit late to the party (as always) but that is funny! One of many of course. :lol:
  10. countrybois

    countrybois Member

    Joined:
    May 2, 2008
    Messages:
    127
    Loc:
    NE Illinois
    ......when everyone else's house seems cold.
  11. BrotherBart

    BrotherBart Hearth.com LLC Mid-Atlantic Division Staff Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2005
    Messages:
    29,065
    Loc:
    Northern Virginia
    ...you don't have hair on the back of your hands from November to May every year.
  12. Redox

    Redox Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2008
    Messages:
    1,099
    Loc:
    Burbs of B'more, MD, Hon!
    .....you get in the car in the morning to go to work and notice your hands smell like woodsmoke from reloading the stove on the way out the door.

    .....you keep sniffing the back of your hand on the way to work and find it relaxing!

    Chris
  13. Valhalla

    Valhalla Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2008
    Messages:
    912
    Loc:
    Essex County, New York
    When you sniff your wood stacks and smile!
  14. bears12th

    bears12th Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2008
    Messages:
    52
    Loc:
    Eastern Connecticut
    When you say, "oooohhhhh, secondary burn achieved!!" and your wife runs into the family room with burn cream and gauze. I can't figure out if I should be flatter she cares about my well being or upset because she doesn't care about the Jotul.
  15. LLigetfa

    LLigetfa Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2008
    Messages:
    7,358
    Loc:
    NW Ontario
    When you can tell the moisture by touch and smell and don't need a moisture meter or laser thermometer.
  16. fallsfire36

    fallsfire36 New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2008
    Messages:
    55
    Loc:
    Northeastern Ohio
    When you drive your truck into a tree while trying to scope out a freshly cut tree on the other side of the road...then end up getting both trees!
  17. CowboyAndy

    CowboyAndy New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 29, 2008
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    744
    Loc:
    Chateaugay, NY
    Have you been spying on me?!?!?!?!?!?




    You know you are a real wood burner when your sister in law drops in crying because she needs someone to talk to about her really messy divorce, and you say "talk to me in the basement while i reload the woodstove", and 30 min later you don't know what she said because you were busy making sure it "took off"...

    :coolgrin:
  18. Cory92

    Cory92 New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2008
    Messages:
    37
    Loc:
    Central Ohio
    When you've read everyone of these posts as a relative newbie, and think to youself " These people are really cool." & " Maybe I'll be just like them by next shoulder season."
  19. meathead

    meathead Feeling the Heat

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2008
    Messages:
    358
    Loc:
    Central Maine
    When your wife is in the middle of cleaning the kitchen windows and mentions when you walk by that "the windows needed a good cleaning" ... and you instinctively get offended and remind her that once it gets up to cruising temp they'll clear right up.
  20. CT-Mike

    CT-Mike Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2008
    Messages:
    499
    Loc:
    New England
    When it is 35 degrees F outside, and the wife goes with you to reload the wood wagon from the HH, you pull the tarp off the top and it causes a couple of gallons of ice cold water to run down her shirt.
  21. pulldownclaw

    pulldownclaw Feeling the Heat

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Messages:
    398
    Loc:
    Richmond, Va
    When you're sitting here at work freezing on a cold rainy day wishing you were at home in front of the stove with the wife and kids.
  22. Valhalla

    Valhalla Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2008
    Messages:
    912
    Loc:
    Essex County, New York
    When your wood stove and it's glass is cleaner than your truck!
  23. dreamingofvermont

    dreamingofvermont New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2008
    Messages:
    3
    Loc:
    Sometimes in Vermont
    When your five year old son builds you a bunch of lincoln log houses and you take a look and see that each home has a chimney and its own neat little stack of wood nearby.

    I am a newbie, but I think I already have my kid hooked!

    Lisa
    Clydesdale insert
  24. n3pro

    n3pro Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2008
    Messages:
    553
    Loc:
    Enola, PA (near Harrisburg the unknown Capitol.
    When you get a dirty look from co-working riding with you because of your angry tone of voice as you pass a tree trimmers grinding up the tree branches for mulch as you say "what a senseless waste of good wood".

    When you are scoping out warehouses for broken wood pallets (skids) and loading them up in the pouring rain.

    When you check out the wood stoves every time you go to the hardware store
  25. cmonSTART

    cmonSTART Minister of Fire

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2007
    Messages:
    2,284
    Loc:
    Antrim, NH
    I hear that!
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