Wow that's tough. Have you been living on a generator since you moved in? Or is there a problem with the current service?. Normally power companies run the poles and charge you for the privilege. Years ago I had to pay a surcharge on my bill for 18 months until two other families moved in my development as the power company only did one "free" pole and I needed three. Some companies offer financing where they surcharge your bill until you pay them off. My brother paid $8,500 to his utility 2 years ago for two tall clearance poles one of them in ledge, a transformer and the cables. I expect they lost money on the deal but they buy poles in bulk and actually hire a sub to set the poles. Border Electric is based somewhere in your area. I think the dad is out of the business but I think his sons that run it and had a good rep 15 years ago. Not much of a referral but that's all I got. If you have trees and in rural area there is lot to be said for using a backhoe to dig a trench, run a conduit and have them pull a direct burial cable in. Unfortunately I don't know how long a distance they can run a cable underground due to voltage loss. Unless someone digs it up you never need to worry about it again.
Going off grid anywhere is expensive up front and there are reoccurring charges for battery replacement. Figure power is going to cost 4 to 5 times what you pay for from a utility. Given the weather and climate in eastern maine you need a very good standby generator and plan on running it a lot in winter. The economics still line up with flooded lead acid batteries. They are very heavy, have to be kept charged and have to be equalized with a generator every few months. Lithium is the next best thing but not yet. Maybe in few years but they still are expensive. Most first time off gridders prematurely "murder" their first set of batteries due to a steep learning curve so most pros recommend going with a cheap set initially and then get a good set when the first set is killed and you have learned your lesson. Edison style nickel iron batteries get a lot of PR but they are expensive and go through lots of water plus the Chinese replacements are not as good as the originals.
You will need a good standby generator and a bulk source of fuel. Many folks end up trading electrical independence for fuel oil independence. A bad thing in rural Maine.
The other big downside is you are the utility and you ultimately end up being the service tech when the lights go out. Few folks have the skills and determination to live with off grid systems. When working and living near rural VT I worked with several long term off gridders and far more former off gridders plus into several folks that were former off gridders and in most cases there were divorces and house fires in their stories. Most battery banks are 48 volts and the amperages are high so when there is a problem if you don't know what you are doing its easy to get severely zapped or start a fire.
One good thing is the federal tax credit can subsidize the cost of the off grid system by 30% (28% in 2020) but given your situation you may not be able to take full advantage of it as its a tax credit so your family needs to have offsetting income taxes. This happens on occasion with retired folks who don't have income. Take a look at this years taxes and see your total tax liability (Line 15 on you form 1040 - Total Tax) , that's all you can offset each year.
I hang out on the Solar PanelTalk forum. There are knowledgeable folks on it but on occasion they can be hard on newbys. Best to lurk and search so you figure out what the dumb questions are. The big answer you need to know is your total daily load in winter and how many days storage you need. Its fairly complicated but the real simple approach is , if you use 4 KWhrs a day and have three cloudy days you need 12 KWhrs of available battery storage plus some to make up for system efficiency loss. You then need enough panels to recharge the batteries in one day or you need to run the generator. The batteries need to be much larger as if you drain them too much you kill the batteries, run them undercharged you kill the batteries, forget to equalize them you kill the batteries, forget to water them kill the batteries, let the terminals get dirty melt a buss bar and possibly start a fire. Lithiums are less picky but they also loose capacity and cost more up front. Note since you are in snow zone, unless the panels are darn close to vertical you will need to shovel them off on occasion and if they are roof mounted that can be a PITA. If you look around for program called PV watts you can see how many panels you need to generate you load in winter based on your location and panel particulars.
That said everyone wants a rough number for system cost. I have 4.6 KW of on grid tied solar which covers my yearly load plus some extra heating but I have a big advantage of net metering so I use my extra power from summer to make up for winter. An off gridder doesn't have that luxury so their system has to be lot larger for winter or they are running the generator a lot. So here is link to place in Mass that I have dealt with in the past and seem to have a good reputation.
https://www.altestore.com/store/solar-power-systems/off-grid-home-solar-power-systems-c567/ Now click on the Base Kit #3 which is probably the bare minimum and select a battery option (where you will find out why Flooded Lead Acid is the way to go) and pick a mounting system. Looks like $17K plus install plus a diesel or propane generator. Now plan that even if you are faithful in baby sitting the batteries which few new folks do, you are replacing a few tons of batteries every 10 to 12 years. Now you know why off gird land and homes are only inexpensive on paper and why folks write big checks to hook up to the grid.
