BTU's per leaf

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I used to rake my yard this time of the year in Old Forge and get about five gallons or more of deer poop. It went straight into the compost bin to be literally recycled, since most of it originated in my garden to begin with!

Adirondack white-tail deer have absolutely no sense of human decency.

I love bats, too. My parents have a tree farm in Wisconsin and their outbuildings are just teeming with cute little bats. One summer when I was out there I collected about ten pounds of guano. That's about a ten-lifetime supply. The kind of bats we have around here eat bugs, so their guano is high in nitrogen. Fruit bat guano is high in phosporous, but you have to buy it imported from places like Jamaica and Indonesia. It's nice to have on hand if you're into organics.

Man, why are we talking about gardening on winter's doorstep?
 
I guess while were on the topic. I have clay soil and I plowed and disked the ground this fall after finishing up the garden. i dont have alot of organic material in the garden, So I thought of putting out leaves in there. Im afraid if I do, they wont break down in time in the spring to be disked up. Either I do leaves, or a cover crop. But I'm afraid its getting too late for a cover crop. This year my 2 gardens werent worth a d%^#. I guess theres next year. I plowed in the spring about 12" deep and I disked it when it was too wet ( I had just got my tractor back from a rebuild) I wanted to play.
 
laynes69 said:
I guess while were on the topic. I have clay soil and I plowed and disked the ground this fall after finishing up the garden. i dont have alot of organic material in the garden, So I thought of putting out leaves in there. Im afraid if I do, they wont break down in time in the spring to be disked up. Either I do leaves, or a cover crop. But I'm afraid its getting too late for a cover crop. This year my 2 gardens werent worth a d%^#. I guess theres next year. I plowed in the spring about 12" deep and I disked it when it was too wet ( I had just got my tractor back from a rebuild) I wanted to play.
I think this thread would be a good read for you and a new garden laynes69 and who ever else wants to read it.

https://www.hearth.com/econtent/index.php/forums/viewthread/2837/
 
This was just posted on Seattle craigslist:

Beautiful Maple Leaves - $50

My beautiful maple tree has recently given birth to a fine crop of leaves that must go! These leaves are in near mint condition (lightly raked) and are in a wide variety of colors ranging from yellowish orange to orange.

They are purebred maple and are available with documentation. The quantity of these leave is staggering, and it is almost unbelievable they all came from one donor tree.

I'd estimate the quantity at about 2.5 cajillion +/- 1 hector. These leaves are ready for pickup in both a neatly stacked pile as well as scattered around my yard.

What would you need with all these pristine quality leaves you might ask. I'm sure you already have tons of great ideas but heres a couple just waiting for someone with some gumption and entrepenuerial spirit to pick up and run with.

1. Sell as pets/collectibles! Heck there's a limited quantity, why not get a sharpie and number them? These thinks make pet rocks look like crap! A little bit of trimming with scissors and a silk dress and you've got a date to the prom mister! Provided I don't chop this huge ass god-awful tree down I could make arrangements to be the supplier for the 2007 series.

2. Large animal traps! You've got a deep hole in the ground and all kinds of exotic beast traffic right? You just need some type of net and my leaves and you could start your own zoo!

3. Become a shill for poorly made vehicles! All you need to produce a good car commercial is footage of a vehicle travelling down a road filled with leaves. Last time I checked roads are free, you've obviously got a car or you wouldn't be able to take these off my property, you are set!

4. Fill a void/space! If there is one problem that seems to transcend all races/cultures/social statuses it's an overwhelming excess of space, this planet is enormous, just try to find your dwelling on a globe! Cram some leaves any where you feel is just a little to big and your problems will melt away.

5. Own a miracle! Given the overwhelming quantity of leaves available coupled with all the various religions practiced, there is a high likelihood that at least one of these leaves closely resembles somebody's Jesus. You just need to take these leaves off my property and sift through to find the one that will inspire people and rejuvenate their faith!

6. Ship them to Toronto as hockey souveniers! It is well documented that Canadians will buy anything. It's time for you to stop being a sucker and start preying on foreigners eh?

7. Start the next health food fad! My puppy has eaten a couple of these leaves and has yet to die. Obviously these are some sort of nature's super food! You have a kitchen and some salt right? I bet you could come up with something. Seriously have you seen some of the crap that passes for health food? These leaves make tofurky look like skunk colon.

8. Use them as stuffing for mattresses/pillows! I'm not totally up on the bible but I bet Jesus himself slept on leaves at some point. Look at all he accomplished. It's been 2000 years and some people still give the guy all their money. The facts don't lie. Leaves=great night sleep + thousands of years of worship.

Obviously with all these great opportunities I'm not going to give these great leaves away. I'd like to trade them for either a Jet Ski, Motorcycle, Luxury Car, leaf blower or CA$H. Please no lowballers or scammers.
 
“Garden TEA” I think that this is dog perfume or at lest my mutts do.
 
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