Hearth Malapropisms

[DAKSY]

I know that most of you hearth-heads have heard customers
family & friends mangle the terms associated with this industry.
Here are some that I remember hearing over the years:
CHIMBLY (or CHIMLEY) - Where the smoke comes out...
FLUME - The inside part of the CHIMBLY...
TERROR COTTON - That orangey stuff that the FLUME is made out of...
DAMPNER - The door thingie in the CHIMBLY FLUME. Sometimes even CALLED the FLUME...
INSERT - a fireplace inserted into the wall...
ZERO TOLERANCE FIREPLACE - A factory-built INSERT
I'm sure more will come to me...
What have YOU heard?

 

[ironpony]

any mis-spelling of a stove you OWN
if you can not spell it correctly
you sure can not operate it correctly

 

[BrotherBart]

Chords of wood.

 

[DAKSY]

Chords of wood.

Aaaah...Musical Heat!

 

[begreen]

We see lots of Mantles above those fireplace Lentils.

 

[fossil]

Masonary.

 

[Adios Pantalones]

Splitting mall

 

[begreen]

defiantly! meaning definitely

 

[billb3]

that popular wood always makes me smile.

I suppose that could fall into a mondegreen list, too.

 

[yooperdave]

A bit indirectly related, but irritating nonetheless!


PHLEGMUM...Must be something wrapped in sheet metal to catch whatever the stove discharges????

 

[Backwoods Savage]

And there are those arshes to take care of.

 

[hossthehermit]

You guys jest prove that iffen ya ain't from around here, ya don't know how to talk right.

 

[BrotherBart]

And cleaning the hot ambers out of the stove.

 

[Delta-T]

we dont get so much of the "flume"...we do get "fluke" (like the meter). "There's a bat in my chimley fluke! Quick, close the dampler!"

in the haircutting world i got to hear "car lick" (the whirl on the top of your head that makes some hairs stick up), and "side birds" (porkchops on the cheek bones)...thems is funny.

 

[Jags]

Wood you like to go cut wood?

 

[Flatbedford]

Wood you like to go cut wood?

I saw that one coming!

 

[Gary_602z]

Libary and Brefast really get me going and also Warshington! But somebody would have taken more pitchers cept they ran out of filum!

Gary

 

[chuckie5fingers]

Splitting mall

Sounds like something out of the SAW movies
Im definately not going there!!

 

[Brokenwing]

being in the fire department the chinese arsonist Chim Lee is the one starting all them fire in the fluke

 

[billb3]

Wood you like to go cut wood?

I saw that one coming!

Cut it out !





I'm gettin' bugged driving up and down this same old strip
I gotta finda new place where the kids are hip

Round round get around ...........