Saying good bye to your best friend

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So sorry to hear the loss of your Aspen. They work their way into your life... I was wiping tears away as I read.

Our newf, Bouncer (yes, he did actually bounce along the driveway when we came home!), also had a very special spot in the hearts of our kids ... their special protection detail. The one night my daughter put him in the house so he couldn't follow her, she was met by a bear cub at the bottom of the steps. He was "Dad" to the kittens we brought home. He passed away at home the morning he was supposed to go to the vets ... he hated car rides and leaving home.

With Gibson, our rescue rottweiler, we figured we wouldn't get another dog. Along came my Schatzi, a rescue german shepherd. Just learned she likely has ligament damage on one leg and potential for future hip problems on the other... only 4 years old.
 
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bag of hammers said:
This week there is a deafening silence in our home.

Our Newf had been slowing down a lot especially this past summer - walks were getting shorter - stopping to rest for a few minutes especially on the warmer days. We thought it was mostly her arthritis, some shoulder joint pain from her past surgery, other signs of aging, and the heat was not helping much either. She still loved her walks.

Last week she went from taking one of her rest stops on the walk one day, to walking a bit funny the next day, to not being able to stand up the next - her back legs gave out on her on Friday morning. It happened almost overnight. I had to lift her into my truck - the vet technicians had to carry her into the building with a couple of slings. The exam uncovered spinal / neurological damage. It had been progressing for a while, but she hid her pain so well that we were clueless until she could not hide it any more. She was not going to be able to walk again.

The prospect of surgery on her spine would have been torture for her - she would try to drag herself across the street if she had to, just to be within a few feet of her people.

Even though we knew she was getting tired, and deep down we knew this was coming one day, we didn't expect to be there making that awful decision that day. We said goodbye at her side, watched her go to sleep, and went home in agony.

Aspen was our "mama dog". She helped us get through losing our golden (Bear) a little over 4 years ago, she stepped in to help fill a big hole in our hearts, she adored our son ("her" little boy), and she watched over her family every day. She adopted me and became my new shadow.

This little fur-ball wrapped herself around our hearts on day 1, almost 9 years ago, and now in an instant she is gone.

View attachment 184554

My better half says that serious look was her way of showing us that she knew she had a job to do - taking care of us. She did it well.

Along the morning walk, there is a contractor's shop - she decided when she was just a pup that she would stop there and look in the door until they saw here and let her in. She walked around from one guy to another letting them pet her, then we were on our way. She 'adopted" them that day, and from that day on, it was a regular stop. If we missed a day, they would worry. We stopped there yesterday to let them know she would not be coming by any more. Bunch of big guys, tough as nails - a couple of them had to leave the garage - the boss broke down and cried.

They say that writing about a heart wrenching experience is a good way to help one deal with grief. Even though I have not met anyone here personally, there are kindred spirits on this forum. You all know the pain and how unbearable it can be when you suffer a loss like this. Thank you for letting me share our story here. As my wife says, "it's gonna suck until it doesn't suck". To everyone here who lost a family member and a friend, our hearts ache for you as well....
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Bag Of Hammers,
My deepest sympathies. It's a small consolation at the present time, but your grief has been shouldered by luminaries through time, and some have been able to convey in prose what is in our hearts. You may already know about Lord Byron's dog Boatswain (Newfie). I find the following verses to be so powerful that I can't read them if I have a pressing engagement. The same qualities that endeared Boatswain to Byron transcend time.

http://readytogoebooks.com/LB-dog63.htm

Newstead-025.jpg
 
Bag of Hammers . . . for those of us who have lost a beloved friend . . . we know exactly how you feel and recognize all too well the mix of emotions that come with such a loss.
 
Bag of Hammers, I was in the same shoes not to long ago, its a deep hurt that just takes time to heal.
 
Thank you all for the kind words.

Kenny - it seems to me that you and Rawr are both winners in the cat lottery - what a sweet, sweet face. He looks like he has a big heart. I hope he brings you many years of joy and companionship.

Lake Girl - it is so incredibly unfair that these beautiful creatures have to deal with so many setbacks and injuries. When Aspen was not even a year old, she was almost crippled by her shoulder problems. I recall the trips down to Michigan State University animal hospital, the surgeries, etc - when all is said and done, I'm just grateful that we had the ability and the opportunity to take care of her back then. She gave us almost 8 more years of love and devotion. I hope things work out for the best for Schatzi and you. He's in good hands.

Soundchasm - thank you for the link to the memorial for Boatswain, I have probably seen some references to Lord Byron before, reading through some of the history around the Newfoundland breed, but never stopped to really appreciate this tribute. I had to read it several times, as it is so beautifully written, and so true.

Sprinter - Angel and Stormy have that "we're home" look - kudos for making that so (and for giving them cool names). You're right, people who aren't "cat people" just haven't realized yet that they are.

Jake - as you said, it's a mix of emotions. As with many others here, you always seem to take the time to remind those of us who are grieving that we're not alone. It always helps to hear that.
 
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bag of hammers said:
Kenny - it seems to me that you and Rawr are both winners in the cat lottery - what a sweet, sweet face. He looks like he has a big heart. I hope he brings you many years of joy and companionship.
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So far he's been really good, I do think he took his cat lottery winnings and is using them to play cat roulette though with all the biting and running around, also he developed a substance abuse problem with cat nip.
 
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I can say that it WILL get easier over time. It will take time and you will see changes in parts of your life that you would never had thought a pet would have an effect on.

Remember to keep your heart open and don't be afraid to let another pet that needs love in.
 
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Thanks Greg - well said.

My wife and I have a stressful life, she knows some days I am really really tired (a lot going on) and once in a while , especially as Aspen started slowing down, we'd have those tough, uncomfortable conversations. What will we do when she's not with us any more? Would be want another dog? I think she was looking for some reassurances - we love dogs, she wants a house full of them. But she also knows they require a lot of time and energy, and both of us know it is not fair to them to bring them into a house and not give them all that. She also sees I'm exhausted some days. I have thought about what it would be like, maybe, to take a break - just to rest a bit.

She asked me this week if I could manage without ever having another dog - suddenly it's no longer even a question. Nothing will replace the pups that have left us, but I believe the next one(s) will come into out lives the same way - they will find us and adopt us, it will happen when it's meant to be.

Being on the receiving end of everything that they have to give is a game changer - I'm a better person, and always trying to be better, all because of what they taught me.
 
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TT pippy.JPG He's big.JPG three pips.JPG
Life wouldn't feel the same without this muttley crew.
Yes, they are dogs, and replaceable. Doesn't diminish the love we have for our tick magnets.
All three are rescues, and that's the only way we roll. Our 150lb Dozer was 6, had displasia, and 24 hrs to live as he was
considered unadoptable. That was three years ago. Country living rehabbed his hip and he bounds around like a puppy!
He's gonna die happy and loved, not under a fluorescent lite on a table. Chewy, the "shephoundlabweiler" (with the wiffle ball)
is my partner in crime. She loves wood scrounging or anything involving a ride in the truck. We unhook the king shepard when
a coyote requires relocation. (coyotes ate our littlest dog) This pack tears them apart if they don't run off fast enuff.

All winter they are guardians of the woodstove. LOL
 

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My condolences go out to you.
 
CheapBassTurd said:
All three are rescues, and that's the only way we roll.
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Congratulations on that. Same here.
CheapBassTurd said:
Country living rehabbed his hip and he bounds around like a puppy!
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That's a great story.;) Good going.

Nice pics. Looks like a happy family. Sorry to hear about the little one. We lost a cat to a coyote years ago. All of our cats have been strictly indoor pets since.
 
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bag of hammers said:
This week there is a deafening silence in our home.

Our Newf had been slowing down a lot especially this past summer - walks were getting shorter - stopping to rest for a few minutes especially on the warmer days. We thought it was mostly her arthritis, some shoulder joint pain from her past surgery, other signs of aging, and the heat was not helping much either. She still loved her walks.

Last week she went from taking one of her rest stops on the walk one day, to walking a bit funny the next day, to not being able to stand up the next - her back legs gave out on her on Friday morning. It happened almost overnight. I had to lift her into my truck - the vet technicians had to carry her into the building with a couple of slings. The exam uncovered spinal / neurological damage. It had been progressing for a while, but she hid her pain so well that we were clueless until she could not hide it any more. She was not going to be able to walk again.

The prospect of surgery on her spine would have been torture for her - she would try to drag herself across the street if she had to, just to be within a few feet of her people.

Even though we knew she was getting tired, and deep down we knew this was coming one day, we didn't expect to be there making that awful decision that day. We said goodbye at her side, watched her go to sleep, and went home in agony.

Aspen was our "mama dog". She helped us get through losing our golden (Bear) a little over 4 years ago, she stepped in to help fill a big hole in our hearts, she adored our son ("her" little boy), and she watched over her family every day. She adopted me and became my new shadow.

This little fur-ball wrapped herself around our hearts on day 1, almost 9 years ago, and now in an instant she is gone.

View attachment 184554

My better half says that serious look was her way of showing us that she knew she had a job to do - taking care of us. She did it well.

Along the morning walk, there is a contractor's shop - she decided when she was just a pup that she would stop there and look in the door until they saw here and let her in. She walked around from one guy to another letting them pet her, then we were on our way. She 'adopted" them that day, and from that day on, it was a regular stop. If we missed a day, they would worry. We stopped there yesterday to let them know she would not be coming by any more. Bunch of big guys, tough as nails - a couple of them had to leave the garage - the boss broke down and cried.

They say that writing about a heart wrenching experience is a good way to help one deal with grief. Even though I have not met anyone here personally, there are kindred spirits on this forum. You all know the pain and how unbearable it can be when you suffer a loss like this. Thank you for letting me share our story here. As my wife says, "it's gonna suck until it doesn't suck". To everyone here who lost a family member and a friend, our hearts ache for you as well....
Click to expand...


Big hugs at ya...and super horsey snuffles from Dixie & Matisse, and kisses and tail wags from Murphy ... and I'll throw in some purrs from Snickers, the new kitty rescue !!
 
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Going through this right now. Crappiest Thanksgiving weekend ever.

Our 12 year old golden retriever. Had an operation last month & was doing really well, but really started slowing down a week ago.

Our 2 oldest kids are away at college, and they came home for the holiday Thursday evening to her being at the vet and us just coming back from there without her, it all happened so fast. Seeing her when they get home is the highlight of their trips back home. We got her back home Saturday for a couple of final days with them, but we had to get her back there yesterday one last time - she was making our decision for us. Now I'm home alone after wife off to work & kids back to school, with an empty house & tears in my eyes & lump in my throat trying to get some work done....
 
Sorry Maple1, its very painful but time will heal all wounds, and hopefully you and your family can open your hearts to another one that needs love and a home.
 
I really feel bad for you. We've been there too many times and know how bad it hurts. It leaves a real hole in the family.
 
Thanks. Seems every day has been tough since we had to leave her at the vet on Thursday. Throw in the kids unknowingly coming home to that, then having to say goodbye & leave again - ugggh. I guess yesterday it hit me again pretty good (bad?) once the silence set in & I was the only one here. Not quite as bad this morning, but still something there and will be for a while.

We'll get through it though, will just take a bit of time.
 
Sorry to hear about the loss of a good family friend. Sounds like you have the toughest part being home alone. If it helps, her last days were spent with those she loved who loved her. My oldest boy's lab sickened so quickly he couldn't get home to say goodbye. At least you older children got that little bit of time.

Early days yet but there are other pups out there that need a home. Can't ever replace, but create their own ...
 
maple1 said:
Going through this right now. Crappiest Thanksgiving weekend ever.

Our 12 year old golden retriever. Had an operation last month & was doing really well, but really started slowing down a week ago.

Our 2 oldest kids are away at college, and they came home for the holiday Thursday evening to her being at the vet and us just coming back from there without her, it all happened so fast. Seeing her when they get home is the highlight of their trips back home. We got her back home Saturday for a couple of final days with them, but we had to get her back there yesterday one last time - she was making our decision for us. Now I'm home alone after wife off to work & kids back to school, with an empty house & tears in my eyes & lump in my throat trying to get some work done....
Click to expand...
My condolences, Maple1. Coming home to the empty house is like a kick in the gut. They really wrap themselves around your heart, it gets ripped out when you lose them.
 
The empty house is the worst, been there. Echos every where, and you seem like you have no purpose.

One will find you, or you will find them, or both.

Chester The Molestor passed Labor Day weekend 8 years ago at the ripe old age of 13, not bad for a shep/chow cross found tied to a guard rail in front of a police sub station in the pouring rain. Issues galore, plus heart worm.. he survived them all. I think he was a bait dog, but we'll never know. Earned his keep one night in the spring. Windows open, and I woke to 80 pounds of Ches flying off of the bed to the bedroom windows, in full attack mode. As I scrambled for my glasses and to turn on a light, outside I heard "I'm not going in there are you?" "nope, let's get out of here" . Earned a fur ever place that night, for sure.

All my dogs had been rescues. But I opted to get some puppy breath, for a change of pace, and never looked back. 28 pounds of smooth haired fox terrier doesn't equal an 80 pound dog, but the heart is there.

My point is, size doesn't matter, they'll find you !!
 
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Dix said:
outside I heard "I'm not going in there are you?" "nope, let's get out of here
Click to expand...
Dix, that gave the goose bumps
 
Dix said:
I think he was a bait dog, but we'll never know
Click to expand...

Hard to understand how someone can be so cold hearted. Good on you for turning that around in a big way. Great story....
 
My profile picture is of Nobby, our Chocolate Lab.
Had to put him down at the age of 13,5 in 2013. A day after I returned from The Netherlands burying my sister.
Great pal, miss him every day.
 
Hard to believe that this post is still active. It's nice to see so many people love there animals.

We are blessed that we waited for our 2nd golden. He's a great dog everything I could ask for in a field dog.

I recently had spine surgery on my neck C4C6 fusion. And I'm home all winter. I can honestly say that animals know when you are not feeling good. They are so attached to you it's amazing. It's a feeling of love and I do believe that they are smarter then we think. I was worried that I could never love another dog as my first and that pain would never go away.

Well I'm pain free now and I have my loyal buddy right next to me all the time. Can't wait to take him hunting this year. Until then he's taking care of me.
 

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