Hi Boozie,
Considering that you reported that your only problem is only when you're lighting a cold stove, you may have the same problem I do. My chimney is on the north side of the house, and if it has not been running for a couple days I will get a very strong downdraft in the chimney. Early on when I first got my stove (~14 years ago), I went through many smokey start-ups. My downdraft can be so strong that even with a big pile of loose newspaper, the downdraft will still push the smoke out into the room. I've heard of some people using a propane torch to blow hot air up the chimney. I've tried that with decent success. I've tried using a candle and that's no good. What works for me every time is to put a handful of sawdust into a ziplock baggy and then pour in about a 1/3 cup of Coleman lantern fuel. It lights rapidly, cleanly, and is not explosive like gasoline would be. Place that within your pile of kindling in your COLD stove and light the bottom corner of the ziploc. You get a quick, clean fire that has enough heat to push the cold air up the chimney within a second or two. There are other solvents that can be used, but I've found that they are either dangerous to use, or start up too slow. The Coleman fuel is safe but effective. That's why they use it in the lanterns.
Most people say I'm crazy for doing this, but then they have never tried it. I expect to get flamed every time I mention this, I'm accustomed to that, so bring it on. If you find this approach too radical, then try the propane torch for about 2 minutes.
Dan