Darwin Awards

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karl

Minister of Fire
Apr 9, 2007
1,058
Huntington, West Virginia
I was reading Darwinawards.com I'm sure you guys know about them, and I ran across this. Enjoy.


(September 2007) A man was splitting seasoned wood early one autumn in preparation for the quickly approaching winter. One after another, he would set a log on end and drive his sharp axe through the log, then toss the split wood onto the pile. He was making light work of the pile when he came to a log with a particularly large diameter.
Feeling overzealous, he decided to split the log anyway. He lined up his shot, and brought the axe down dead-center, only to bury the axe blade deep in the girthy log without splitting it. With a swift action, he jerked up on the handle to free the axe for another swing. In doing so, the log scooted forward about a foot before the axe broke free.

Rather than move the heavy log back into place, the man stepped forward a foot to take another swing. The second swing met with the same result as the first, as did the third attempt, the fourth, and so on. In his relentless determination to split the unsplittable, the man did not notice that he and the log had traveled some twenty-five feet across the yard, and were now positioned beheath the clothesline.

As he brought the axe down for another whack at the log, the axe head caught the clothesline, which acted in the same manner as a bow string. The axe head barely touched the top of the log when the clothesline reached its maximum draw, propelling the axe head back toward the man at an ungodly velocity. It found its mark right between his eyes.

Fortunately, the blunt side of the axe head made contact, and rather than killing him, it merely collapsed his sinus and fractured his skull. He recovered, and learned a very important lesson: Always be aware of your surroundings when hurling a sharp object through the air with great force.

Original Submission
 
-- Unfortunately, I can relate to that. Got my first splitter after the night I was splitting some nasty elm with my axe by moonlight-- getting frustrated with one particular piece, I must have shifted position a bit- really wound up with the axe & hooked my dog's overhead STEEL trolley wire! The cable didn't break, but it felt like my head and right ear did. Went in the house and told my wife that it was time for a splitter!

Woodrat
 
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