Beetle-Kill said:
Craig, your wife has been doing this since 1996??!! And yet, you still have a roof over your head? --- OMG

You are SO lucky!! ( And, you are so F#@k'd when the Ladies here read this.)
Nah, he just makes us appreciate the rest of you all the more.
"What does your husband want it for?" ROFL! Been awhile since I heard that--takes me back!
Kathleen, when you send off for one of those wifey-people, would you pick out one for me, too? Make sure she's a little on the tech-y side so she can finish up these projects I'm working on . . . someone who's handy with the plumbing, wiring, could knock out a couple of bookcases for me, paints, cooks, cleans . . . needs to be agile so she can get up on the roof and clean the gutters, stovepipe, etc. . . . maybe could get a job and pay the mortgage, pick up the kid after school, help w/homework, pay the bills, shovel the driveway, chop wood, fix cars, feed the dog . . . and oh, yeah, operate the woodstove. Wait! never mind, that would be me, and I don't think I could take another one of me around here. Unless she like sto sharpen chainsaws . . .
Was teaching my daughter to run a splitting maul the other day--off to college on a full-ride scholarship, but can't swing an axe. She wasn't being very patient with herself, and I asked her if she knew the best way to learn to split wood. She said she didn't, and I told her, "Necessity."
Craig, I'm going to assume the fact that she bought your line is not a reflection on her intelligence, so it may be that you're just such a good provider that she has never had to exert herself on her own behalf. WTG! Or, she's really, really messing with your head. I'd plant a camera, and if she's giggling madly while she singes the paper and arranges it in the stove, then she is BUSTED!
ETA: . . . and likes to fish, hunt, fill the freezer, do yardwork, garden, tends the flower beds and baskets, washes windows, does taxes, cleans the garage . . . gee, I can't wait . . .
ETAM: . . . and knit, sew, mend, fix windows, shop frugally, be esp. good at looking for bargains on CL and eB . . . an artistic streak would be nice, get a few more paintings on the walls . . .