Is this guy talking about us?

[PAJerry]

Ain't nuttin better than Granny's possum soup a-simmerin on that thar wood stove!

 

[sgcsalsero]

I bought two houses in the last 4 years. Every house that had a fireplace the realtor either pointed out and/or
listed in their nauseating glossy brochures. Realtor.com has as one of their main search criteria 'fireplaces'.
If it was such a hillbilly thing, then the market wouldn't be valuing and highlighting.

 

[PutnamJct]

Jeez, I got's me 2 Pit Bulls, a Ford Truck and a 65 Plymouth with a big ole 440 in my front yard. I be getting ready to put some purty flowers in the toilet bowl on the porch come spring.......cept the damn accounting department said the company i owns sales are up yet again. Dang I'll get around to it someday I reckon.

 

[Mo Heat]

Brother Bart,

Your Jed Clampit poem is priceless! I wish I'd a'wrote 'er.

Good laugh! Very good laugh! Thanks.

 

[carpniels]

Hi Guys,

I know my Masters from Holland isn't worth much here, but calling me a hillbilly is going to far. I agree with Roospike, must not have gotten anything from his wife in a while.

I like the exercise, I like the price and I like the heat.

Carpniels

 

[Mo Heat]

... and I almost forgot to credit the one who got this enjoyable little thread started...

The Chimney Sweep,

It's good to hear from you again. Thanks for sharing that jewel of an email.

 

[pinetop]

let's see the economic engine is screechin' to a halt now hill billy hank has a few older cars in his yard.But he also has a supply of firewood, a half acre garden ,a root cellar well stocked with home canned goods, and a smokehouse ..ceo charles has a few newer cars in his yard a half acre of cement,an energy dependant castle and a wine cellar lets see when the crap hits the fan i think i'd be learnin how to play the fiddle not the violin. refering to someone as an old hippie or as salt of the earth is a compliment ...a yuppie not really.

 

[BrotherBart]

let's see the economic engine is screechin' to a halt now hill billy hank has a few older cars in his yard.But he also has a supply of firewood, a half acre garden ,a root cellar well stocked with home canned goods, and a smokehouse ..ceo charles has a few newer cars in his yard a half acre of cement,an energy dependant castle and a wine cellar lets see when the crap hits the fan i think i'd be learnin how to play the fiddle not the violin. refering to someone as an old hippie or as salt of the earth is a compliment ...a yuppie not really.

Worthless stock options work good on top of the kindling in the top-down fire starting method though.

And they make some of that colored smoke people talk about here from time to time.

 

[Mo Heat]

let's see the economic engine is screechin' to a halt now hill billy hank has ...
..ceo charles has ...

Astute observation pinetop. I'd prefer the hillbilly property in a social meltdown AND when the electric bill came due. Of course, CEO Charles probably has a pretty good time drinking wine in his Lamborghini. Probably attracts the babes, too. But he'll probably have free room and board at the local Big House for insider trading by the time the feces hits the furnace.

 

[MountainStoveGuy]

it would be nice of the thread starter to email a link of this thread to the person who laid the email on him. I think author deserves to see the hottest thread of late.

 

[tjg911]

Come listen to my story bout a man named Jed
Poor mountaineer hardly kept his family fed
Then one day he was chopping up some wood
When up to his block
Walked some snotty Canuck dude
Slick feller. Tasseled loafers. Ascot.

Well the next thing you know old Jed's installed forced air
Kin folks said "Jed it's freezing cold in there"
They said renewable heat is where you oughta be
So he dusted off the saw and went lookin for a tree
Bore cut. Hand split. Stacked in a Holtz Hausen.

member this one? too funny!

reading thru the back pages

tom

 

[Willhound]

Elsewhere in the diatribe he mentions he's from Canada.

Must be an immigrant. Most of the stand-up Canadians I know would kick this guy's A** just on principle. Oooops...I guess that makes me an un-educated redneck woodburner too eh?

 

[Eric Johnson]

Well, shucks. My man Red Green comes from Canada. And if he don't burn wood, I don't know who do.

I like Red's motto:

I'm a man.
I can change.
If I have to.
.....I guess.

I musta missed BB's rework of the BH theme the first time around. Priceless. Almost as good as the X-rated version from back in the day.

 

[begreen]

I get a lot of E-mails every day, generated by visitors to my hearth product website. Most are written by folks with hearth-related questions, some are purchase orders, a few are compliments about the site. The ones that don't fall into any of those categories tend to be my favorites. Received this one today, and thought I'd share it with the forum. This is actually just an exerpt from a very long rant, but here you go:

"Wood smoke stinks and is "hillbilly heating" from caveman days. Where I live I have never met an intelligent wood burner - they are backwards, ignorant (education wise), they drive pickup trucks, and smoke cigarettes. I was a former by-law officer in our area and 75% of the unsightly properties were wood burners with their collection of railway ties, pallets, milled wood , treated wood and garbage and of course the derelict vehicles. Their properties are breeding grounds for rats, weasels and termites."

- gere

I finished this letter and said to myself, "Why, this extraordinarily perceptive individual has described me to a tee!" I wonder how many other members of the forum might be similarly amazed.

At first I thought it might be a local from Darrington. In that town it seems like they are competing to outsmoke each other there and the valley bowl traps it all.

 

[jjbaer]

Elsewhere in the diatribe he mentions he's from Canada.

Ah....Canada...... "an empty apartment above a large party....."

 

[kevinmoelk]

Wow. What a foolish man. There's no shame in being a redneck. I live in the country, have 7 trucks (most International Harvesters from the 60's) and I'm making a conscience choice to ADD wood heat to my home. Yet, I must be some fool to do so. No reason for me to list the logic others have done so well.

My house is a little run down, I've got building materials scattered behind my garage... so what. There's a reason I left Washington, DC, New York City and Portland, OR. No crowds, no traffic jams, no high crime, no 2 hour commute, no people telling me how to live my life, etc, etc. How dumb am I? Well I suppose the e-mail guy wouldn't want to be my neighbor... until that is he needed me to pull him out of a ditch with one of my Scouts, or help him move something heavy, or watch after his pets when he is gone... all things country folks do around here. Wow, what a concept to live around hard working, down to earth people.

Someone like that (the original e-mail sent to Tom) is clearly an arrogant individual. He feels it's okay to look down upon others, and judge them. I feel sorry for him that he has not met many people who choose to live a simple life.

-Kevin

 

[Jags]

**HIC*** Thish stuff would be funny ***hic*** if I wasn't sho drunk on shine ,and light **hic** headed from CO2 poisoning. OUCH, that darn metal box is HOT. ***HIC*** Come 'eer doggie, you wanna little ship of this shtuff? **hic**

 

[MrGriz]

What a great old thread; laughed my A$$ off reading it.

If weez all such bassackward folk, wat wit our wood heat an all... why would this guy e-mail. Shouldn't we all be too stupid or stoned to read it? Computer, what's a computer? Gotta composter in the eatin room...and iz compacted as hell in da butt der, must be from all that government cheese...but i doezn't know nuttin bout no computer. E-mil, ya he lives down the holler.

 

[drizler]

I have news for anyone who laughs at this and thinks they are fortunate not to have these critters living near them. They aren't very observant because these Hillbillies are around every damned one of us. They are mostly on some form of welfare, suck social services dry and pollute the general environment with their very existence. Just take a peek at nearly every trailer park. Even a good trailer park will quickly deteriorate into scumbag ville in a pretty short time. What gets me is all the stuff they have. I remember a very liberal college prof I had after I had quit my job as a prison guard in 87 to burn up my GI bill. He laid out all this you owe your fellow man to the point of extreme sacrifice thing. I couldn't take it. I laid out the facts and figures of what I had been making what I owned as opposed to my neighbors the hillbillies. My cars were 10 and 14 years old with the wife working full time and me in the Nat Guard while the bums had 2 new snowmobiles, a fairly new 4 wheeler, a 2 year old car and about the same year old truck. He worked as an electrician during the summer took full advantage of NY unemployment while doing basements and additions under the table winters and got food from the local food pantry with his wife not doing anything. At the end of my little speech the class, mostly in their early 20's were quite impressed. And people wonder why they pay such sky high taxes, their medical care is better than yours is and completely free. The last point is that they really need it as they are perpetually knocked up, beat up, drug and or booze dependant and otherwise generally unhealthy. Truly the American Dream. About the only ambition they manage is to grow some grass and if especially gifted cookin up some Meth.

 

[CountryGal]

I was going to make a comment, but my hairdo got caught in my ceiling fan and my porch just fell and injured 6 dogs.

 

[kevinmoelk]

Driz, I understand your point, but quality of life should not be evaluated by the things someone owns, or the income they earn. Just as there are poor people on welfare who clearly abuse or circumvent policy, so are there those that truly need welfare. What would you say about all the extremely wealthy people able to hire high powered accountants who are able to skirt tax laws? Are these wealthy people any better than the poor person trying to beat the system?

Surely those who partake in crime and drugs will most likely end up poor, if not dead. That's the plain and simple truth. But does it mean that all poor people are criminals or drug users? Does it mean that poor people are lazy because they are poor? I would suggest that many of those folks never had the chance at a decent education, many had parents that did not instill good values, etc. Poor people aren't bad just because they are poor, neither are rich people nice or hard working necessarily.

Have I worked hard my whole life not to end up in the circumstances many poor people face? Sure I have. But I also was provided with the opportunity for an excellent education, and parents who pushed me to do well in school. I drive a '92 Toyota pickup. Can I afford to buy a newer truck? Sure, but I have no need to. People value objects differently. There's no need to be hateful of those who have different priorities. Maybe if the guy with the new snowmobiles worked hard and saved a little he could buy a real house and move his family out of the crappy neighborhood... but alas, that is his choice.

Also, you'd be surprised at what a new "trailer" home is these days. While they will never be as nice as a site built home, the quality of construction is a far cry from those built in the 70s. Not only quality has risen, but price as well. Many of the manufactured homes today can go for 150K and more.

I'd suggest that if you truly are concerned about the welfare of poor people in this nation, that you work to hire elected officials who will repair the laws governing welfare.

 

[CountryGal]

As a former single mother who was on welfare once in my life, thank you for making that point.

I once stood in line in the grocery store with my food stamps and was insulted by a woman behind me who said, "Gee, I wish I could feed my family so well, but I WORK!" I turned to her and told her that I had CANCER and would be HAPPY to trade places with her if she wished. She STFU. (Web, please delete if this is offensive!)

Yes, and I am grateful to the State of California that I was able to have 2 cancer surgeries paid by the taxpayers. Because of that, I have been able to more than pay it back in my taxes every year and I don't b**** about how much I pay. I am grateful that it was there when I needed it. Nevermind that the anesthesiologists put MediCal patients on a waiting list and if it hadn't been for a kind doctor, I would have had to wait at least 3 months for my first surgery.

Yes, I bought good food for my children with food stamps. We had no money for anything else. FS did not cover laundry soap, toothpaste, toilet paper, bath soap or anything non-edible. That was back in 1976 and I am still grateful. So I don't make blanket judgements about people I know nothing about. You don't KNOW what they are dealing with and I pray you never have to walk a mile in their shoes.

 

[Willhound]

Elsewhere in the diatribe he mentions he's from Canada.

Ah....Canada...... "an empty apartment above a large party....."

Remember.....We're bigger, and we're on top. If this was prison, you'd be our B!%(# ;-P

Actually, maybe it's an irate American posing as a Canadian? Sort of like Americans travelling abroad and sticking Canada flag decals on their luggage and backpacks so that they don't get hassled. We may seem meek and mild mannered, but don't get us P.O.'d.

Last time you did, we sent you Celine Dion !!

 

[wg_bent]

Elsewhere in the diatribe he mentions he's from Canada.

Ah....Canada...... "an empty apartment above a large party....."

Remember.....We're bigger, and we're on top. If this was prison, you'd be our B!%(# ;-P

Actually, maybe it's an irate American posing as a Canadian? Sort of like Americans travelling abroad and sticking Canada flag decals on their luggage and backpacks so that they don't get hassled. We may seem meek and mild mannered, but don't get us P.O.'d.

Last time you did, we sent you Celine Dion !!

Celine Dion is Canadian? Jeez there goes my opinion of Canadian music. Naaahhh even she can't screw that up...Rush is just too awsome.

 

[Webwidow]

. I was a former by-law officer in our area and 75% of the unsightly properties were wood burners with their collection of railway ties, pallets, milled wood , treated wood and garbage and of course the derelict vehicles. Their properties are breeding grounds for rats, weasels and termites." .

This is the scary part. This guy was by-law official, the code dude, I assume the fellow who could walk onto your property and write you nice hefty fines, close down your store. kick you out of house. Nitpick because of his bias.