What a funny thread. Thanks for the laughs, you guys.
Jake, your post is perfect, along with so many other guys'... so are Eileen's and Kathleen's.
We took down a bunch of trees to build the bahn. BIL took down several on his property, too. We "scored big" and there was no way in hell the bounty was going to be hauled away "for free" after the tree guys did their thing. OK, where to stack the stuff we'd split? Practical and pragmatic to my very marrow I quickly realized that to take best advantage of sun and prevailing wind and keep the stacks out of public view I'd have to sacrifice my beloved back yard. 'bout broke my heart but in the greater context... not a big deal! The husband and I carefully stacked it neatly and I "sucked it up". I was promised that the wood would be moved under cover in one year's time and IT WAS! Workin' on wood can be a mutually satisfyin' thing, lol.
I work in the Home Dec. trade. I'm all about aesthetics, "how things look". But, sometimes you can't always have the "look" you want immediately. Sometimes minimizing the "damage" is the best you can hope for, lol. Here's the question I always ask myself: is this the hill I want to die on? I've yet to find that it is, frankly. I had one of my gardening friends over last year, she confided that there was no way she'd "allow" that sort of thing in her backyard. I smiled and said that knowing I had the best part of $1500/wood in my yard was just fine with me... , shoulda seen her face. She had no idea how much those stacks were "worth" and it was a dope slap for her since her husband was unemployed. For the "girls" out there who like a cozy home and don't participate in the "wood thing"...
Wood=Work=Money. Simple. It's a time and motion, "piece rate" thing... handle it as few times as you have to and you'll derive the most benefit. Pretty simple when you winnow it down to the "least common denominator". And to the guys out there... make the time to discuss the siting and the relative benefits to the "little woman". And do your best to make the stacks neat and keep them tidy. It will mean a lot, trust me.
(I hate to cook, but I happily clean up the trail the husband leaves behind. Having good food on the table without having to lift a finger to do it is more luxurious than I can say. A meal never cooks under this roof without, "wow, that smells great!" and it never ends without a sincere, "that was fabulous, thank you for a lovely meal".
I may grouse about the number of pans/dishes deployed to create it, but I always clean them up!)