I must have not explained myself well. Let me clarify.
1) We would NEVER be using the wood stove at the same time as our the forced air heat. It will ALWAYS be either/or. That is why we have the lid idea.
2) We have NO intention of covering that return register permanently. We both understand that that cannot be done. I would mess up the approved, expert plan of the HVAC guy who he installed our furnace. I am talking about a removable metal lid.
Since the hearth is allowed to be not only the cement board and ceramic tile we are going to use, but also simple sheet metal, it seems it should be fine to cover the return register with a metal fitted "lid" (I want one with a handle, like on a pot) over the register when the furnace is off and we are going to use the wood stove. This seems logical, unless we are missing something.
The lid can stay stored inside the stove, in front, propped so it's in the way of any wood you want to put tin, shiny metal and noticeable, so that when we go to use the stove we must first remove the lid, which would go directly over the register.
My husband needs to prepare the cement board tomorrow morning so our tile installer can later tomorrow install the tile, and then the chimney guy can, as planned, finish putting all the parts together next week. Actually, the cemented tile will be just on the wall behind. For the hearth, our installer will cut the tile to fit the cement hearth board my husband cuts, the tile will just sit on it without cement (laid closely, edge to edge), and my husband will make wood edging to contain the tile.
So I think tomorrow when my husband cuts teh cement board, he will just cut a hole for the register in the exact size for the exact spot.
Our time for this project, our budget and the space in this area (and the space in the whole house) are all limited. Adding a major reconstruction project of relocating a register would unnecessarily stress all three constraints: time, budget and space. So the fitted metal lid idea seems a great fix, unless we missed something. Seems like probably not? Or someone would have explained what we missed.
I am overwhelmed at how much there is to learn and do in order to get a stove and install it safely. I had NO idea how involved each step of the way could be.
I am SO grateful for the help here choosing our stove. I felt such relief when it was being delivered that I did not have to worry we had chosen the wrong one! I really don't know how else we could have gotten that very helpful feedback, and so quickly, just when we needed it. Thank you so much, Hearth.com!
The guy at Rockford Chimney Supply was very helpful explaining all we needed to know about liners and they sent what we needed very quickly and I am glad we ordered from them.
The guy tiling for us tomorrow is a mason who has done two mason jobs for us before (footing and foundation for my husband's carpentry) and we like and trust him. (My husband can do so many things and we have done a remarkable am amount of DIY things on our house, but he does not like masonry.)
And the chimney guy who will help us put it all together next week gave us a whole very intense entire hour on the phone with us, analyzing exactly what needed to be done for every single aspect of the safe installation, after looking at our email with pictures and measurements.
My goal when I started was everything in place for heating with wood this winter if needed, and as soon as possible. I had no idea it would involve SO MUCH. It has been a huge initiation into the world of wood stoves. And that's just purchase and installation. I still have to learn about wood and then actually lighting and keeping a fire!