Perfume!!

[woolybugger141]

Yes, i am a last minute shopper for the wife. Went to the local department store and checking out the diff perfumes. Holy crap theres alot of them. The sales lady had me sniffin so many different perfumes i couldnt take it anymore. I finally asked her if there is perfume that smells like a fresh split piece of oak. Wow, the blank stare i got Merry X-mas

 

[smokinj]

lol merry x-mass

 

[derecskey]

Did you really?

 

[firefighterjake]

Oh Woolybugger, of course she gave you a strange look . . . everyone knows that the smell of oak is for men . . . what you should have asked is if she had any perfumes that smelled like cedar or pine.

 

[rathmir]

I prefer my women to smell like race gas.....mmmmmm c16

 

[Backwoods Savage]

I thought about some perfume for my wife too so went out and cut some sassafras. Man that stuff smells good enough to eat! Roots also make good sassafras tea.

 

[CrawfordCentury]

I finally asked her if there is perfume that smells like a fresh split piece of oak. Wow, the blank stare i got Merry X-mas

As I understand perfume, it's purpose is to illicit arousal in men. Make sure you count the growth rings on any crotch wood in your pile to make sure it's old enough to consent!

 

[clinkerstinker]

Red oak or white oak?

If it's red oak scent you want, you could possibly substitute rotten cheese or maybe baby puke scent.

 

[iskiatomic]

I prefer my women to smell like race gas…..mmmmmm c16

With a hint of burning rubber also!



KC

 

[ROBERT F]

I prefer my women to smell like race gas…..mmmmmm c16

With a hint of burning rubber also!



KC

And two stroke!

 

[Adabiviak]

Get her some vanilla scented perfume and call it Jeffrey Pine. (I don't know if that grows on the east coast?)

 

[bambam]

I finally asked her if there is perfume that smells like a fresh split piece of oak. Wow, the blank stare i got Merry X-mas

As I understand perfume, it's purpose is to illicit arousal in men. Make sure you count the growth rings on any crotch wood in your pile to make sure it's old enough to consent!

If you are close enough to the crotch to count rings then you might as well split, stack and burn it.

 

[Cedrusdeodara]

I thought about some perfume for my wife too so went out and cut some sassafras. Man that stuff smells good enough to eat! Roots also make good sassafras tea.

I second that, Sassafras roots/wood smell great. Quick note, there is some controversy about Sassafras tea and the FDA has banned its use in food products because it caused liver cancer in some lab mice. However, homeopathic folks and Native Americans profess it has great health benefits. This medical link states that the health benefits are bunk and that sassafras consumption should be avoided:
(broken link removed to http://www.bccancer.bc.ca/PPI/UnconventionalTherapies/SassafrasTea.htm)


Another great smelling tree..... Magnolia. The wood and roots from basically any species of magnolia smell like perfume, especially the roots. And many magnolia seeds have the smell of coffee. I've never really burned either sassafras or magnolia though, so I can't attest to their smells when burnt.[del][/del]

 

[Steveo]

I want my woman to smell like a stripper lol, so I went to victoria secret to get perfume for my wife.